


Adventures With the Tight-Knit Family

by praisesataan



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: F/F, F/M, I love falsettos, Ice Skating, M/M, a mess, adventures with the tight knit family, but i'm going to anyway, i can't write whizzvin but i do anyway, i have to idea what tags are supposed to be, i'm just rambling now, idk if i can write but i am anyway deal w it, its a vibe, oh i'll probably write more in this series, so i probably shouldn't limit these tags to ice skating, they play animal crossing, tight knit family, well yeah have fun reading folks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:54:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23068822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/praisesataan/pseuds/praisesataan
Summary: The Tight-Knit Family go places, see stuff, do things, do each other, forget that last one, and are a chaotic mess!
Relationships: Dr. Charlotte/Cordelia (Falsettos), Trina/Mendel Weisenbachfeld, Whizzer Brown/Marvin
Comments: 29
Kudos: 39





	1. Ice Skating

**Author's Note:**

> WOOO THIS IS MY FIRST FALSETTOS FIC IM PUBLISHING  
> im very scared pls be nice to me aaaaaaaa  
> i literally don't know what i'm doing but hi hello i'm sophie and this is my ao3 and. yeah! i decided to write the tight-knit family ice skating because,,, i was going ice skating and i thought the material was chaotic enough lol  
> uh yeah that's all i'm gonna say rn before i regret posting this so yeehaw have fun this is scary ah  
> BUT BEFORE I GO i would like to say i have no idea how old i'm writing jason lmaoooo. maybe like. 10? idk yall. i'm a fake writer sue me but uh yeah

“Hurry up before I leave you cowards here!” Trina shouted from the doorway, clutching her son’s hand.

“Not all of us are skating masters, Trina,” Marvin replied, fumbling with the laces on the skates.

Cordelia stood up, stumbling with her skates. “I’m ready! Don’t leave me!”

Charlotte stood up, too, grabbing her girlfriend’s hand as she steadied herself. “Yeah, hurry up, you guys,” she told the boys as she and Delia made their way to the door with Trina.

“How the fuck do these things work?” a disgruntled Marvin asked his boyfriend, who had just finished tying his knot.

“It’s literally like tying your shoes normally,” Whizzer replied, vaguely amused.

“But you have to put them around the things?” Marvin asked, gesturing at the mess of laces around his skates.

“I have no idea what that means,” Whizzer replied, smirking.

“Whizzer, I swear to God-”

“Fine!” Whizzer gave in, tightening his boyfriend’s laces. “If you ever make me do this again, that may be the last you ever hear of Whizzer Brown.”

Marvin chuckled softly, as Whizzer stood up and extended his arm to Marvin, who grabbed on and got himself to his feet.

“You coming, Mendel?”

Mendel, who was staring hopelessly at the skates, replied aimlessly, “To be determined.”

“Trina!” Whizzer shouted to the door, attracting glares from others working with their skates. “Help your boyfriend!”

“Oh my God,” Trina muttered softly as she passed Whizzer and Marvin, who were steadily reaching the door.

“I will never let you live down today,” Whizzer said, shooting a smirk to his boyfriend gripping his arm.

“Fuck you,” was Marvin’s only response as they finally met with the others at the door.

“We should leave her, just for the irony,” Whizzer muttered to the others waiting, looking at Trina, who was shaking her head and unknotting Mendel’s skates.

“We should. We really should,” Cordelia replied, laughing softly to herself.

“Are we assholes? Let’s put it to the test,” Charlotte said, grinning.

“No cursing in front of Jason,” Marvin said automatically, before adding on, “but yes, we are. Let’s go.”

Laughing, the five of them hurried out of the room and into the cold as fast as their skates would take them, Trina’s shout of “HEY!” following them out.

“Oh shit. Oh fuck. I regret this,” Marvin said, as he followed everyone onto the ice.

Whizzer skated smoothly on the ice, Charlotte and Delia at his heels. “You can’t skate?” He asked, trying (and failing) not to laugh.

“Not really, no,” Marvin replied, grasping onto the side of the rink.

“We should’ve gotten you one of those things,” Whizzer laughed, pointing to Jason, who was being supported by a skate helper.

“Fuck you,” Marvin replied, nearly slipping but feeling his way down the rink. “I can do this. It’ll just take a minute.”

“Sure,” Whizzer replied, grinning wide. “I’m gonna do a lap, I’ll be back.”

“Race you!” shouted Jason, pulling up behind Whizzer.

“You’re on,” Whizzer replied, smirking, before speeding off.

“Wait!” Jason replied, pushing forward, chasing the taller man.

“This is for all those chess games!” Whizzer shouted back, skating farther away.

“You have longer legs! Not fair!” Jason shouted, several feet behind.

“You have the helper thing!” Whizzer retorted.

“You can skate to begin with!”

“Hmm, fair,” Whizzer replied, skating neatly to the wall behind his boyfriend. “Hey,” he replied, panting slightly, grinning at Marvin.

Jason slammed into the wall behind Whizzer. “Whizzer!”

“What?” Whizzer asked innocently, turning to face Jason.

Trina entered the rink, skating quickly to her son. “Whizzer, did I just witness you beating my son in a skating race?”

“Yes,” Whizzer replied, a sort of pride in his voice. “Yes, you did.”

“Let the child win, Whizzer!” Trina replied, a joking exasperation in her tone.

“I don’t think his pride can withstand that,” Marvin smiled, hugging his boyfriend from behind.

“Fuck you,” was Whizzer’s response, although he didn’t object when Marvin pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Turning around and grinning, he grabbed Mavin’s hands and lead him into the center of the rink. “This is the biggest fucking mistake you will ever make, I swear to God, Whizzer, we’re both gonna die, what the fuck are you doing-”

“Relax, love,” Whizzer smiled. “Are you underestimating my skating abilities?”

“YES-” Marvin began before Whizzer interrupted him.

“Let me amend, are you underestimating my skating abilities if your answer may leave you alone without support in the middle of the rink?”

“Fuck you,” Marvin replied.

“Love you, too,” Whizzer grinned.

Whizzer tried to let go of one of Marvin’s hands, Marvin’s tough grip keeping them together. “Trust me,” Whizzer said with a small smile that must have comforted Marvin enough to obey.

Once they were connected by only one hand, Whizzer skated around Marvin, spinning the smaller man around with him.

“Whizzer, I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD!”

“What?” Whizzer asked, laughing.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck,” Marvin responded, clasping onto Whizzer’s hand, “We’re going to DIE, Whizzer, I swear to fucking God, we’re going to fall and die and our funeral is going to be awful because we only have four friends and a child, Whizzer I swear, stop spinning, or I swear to God, I will- FUCK!”

Both of them had crashed onto the ice, Whizzer completely succumbing to a fit of laughter, and Marvin, a little more panicked, couldn’t resist looking at his lover and letting out a laugh of his own. “Fuck you,” he grinned.

“I think you’ve said fuck an ungodly number of times today, Marv. You might want to work on that,” Whizzer replied as he got up from the hard ice, smiling.

“Help me up, asshole,” Marvin retorted. Whizzer looked a tiny bit like he wanted to skate away just for the look on Marvin’s face, so Marvin hastily continued, “You owe me!”

“Fine,” Whizzer sighed, extending his arm and letting Marvin climb back up, “but fuck you.”

“Noted,” Marvin grinned, as he grabbed Whizzer’s hand and let Whizzer lead him back to the comforts of the wall.

Across the rink, Trina was helping Mendel with, albeit, a better strategy, but even less effective results.

“Just copy me, okay? Keep your arm above the side, but not touching, so it’s there if you need it. Start just with walking like you normally would.” She demonstrated before turning back to see how Mendel was catching up.

“Shit,” Mendel muttered, keeping up a mantra of “shit shit shit” as he attempted to copy Trina, having to grab onto the wall after every step.

“You can do it, you just need to believe in yourself! You can do it!” Trina encouraged, to little results.

After falling twice (although, Trina’s first lesson had been on how to control his falling, so there were no disastrous long-term effects) and making not one successful step, he fell back into Trina.

“You okay?” she asked lightly, helping him upright.

“Yeah,” Mendel grinned sheepishly up at her. “Can I watch you skate for awhile? You look so pretty and graceful when you skate.”

“Oh, yeah, sure,” she replied, taken aback by the request, but pleased all the same. She helped him off the rink and skated freely for a while, occasionally stopping with the lesbians to go a lap with Jason.

When not with his mother, Jason was having the time of his life. Cordelia and Charlotte pushed him around, sometimes skating alongside and letting him go on his own. He was thrilled to say that he had fallen the least of the group (not at all), blissfully ignoring everyone that pointed out it would be more of an achievement to manage falling in itself with his skate helper.

"You up for another lap, Jason?" Cordelia asked, a little out of breath, but grinning kindly down at him as his smile widened and he gave vigorous nods.

"Wait for me!" Whizzer called out, skating up behind them. "I've abandoned Marvin. He's abusing my skating talent."

"It was only a matter of time before he joined us," Charlotte sighed to Cordelia, mocking disappointment.

"Yeah, what happened last time you skated with Jason?” Cordelia asked, amused.

“I raced with Jason because he asked me to,” was Whizzer’s response, the corners of his mouth twitching.

“I seem to recall you winning that race, Whizzer, and beating the child is not allowed!” Charlotte scolded, smiling all the same.

“Yeah, Whizzer,” Jason added, laughing.

“You guys are the worst. I let my pride be wounded in chess every day, and I’m not allowed to win one ice-skating race? I call BS,” Whizzer replied merrily. “But I will challenge you to a rematch,” he added with a grin.

“You’re on,” Jason replied, and the two were off again.

Jason was the winner, only because Cordelia sabotaged Whizzer by knocking him over, proceeding to get Marvin involved, who couldn’t even skate to them and ended up falling a million times before he reached his boyfriend, who was already on his feet and laughing hysterically with Jason and the lesbians. “Are you okay?” Charlotte asked, trying to manage her laughter.

“I’m fine, you assholes,” Marvin replied, shaking his head but unable to suppress a smile.

“Witnessing that,” Whizzer saying, choking down laughs and twirling his finger towards where Marvin fell, “made losing entirely worth it.”

“Fuck you,” Marvin replied as Whizzer helped him to his feet again.

Charlotte shouted “Stop swearing in front of the child!” as Whizzer shouted “New drinking game - take a shot every time Marvin says fuck!”

Charlotte glared at him, while Cordelia bent over in hysterics. “We are not playing that drinking game, that would just encourage him.”

“Which would get me drunk! Where’s our problem?” Whizzer said, winking as skated away from Charlotte who immediately began to chase him around the rink.

Marvin grabbed onto his son’s skating helper, watching his lover zoom around the rink, a screaming Charlotte at his heel. Smiling to himself, he made a mental note to grab Whizzer’s camera later and take a picture. Even if he couldn’t take photos for shit and Whizzer would kill him for even touching his camera, at least he could remember it.


	2. Animal Crossing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whizzer and Jason play Animal Crossing with Charlotte and Cordelia. Marvin is not impressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have Risen  
> hi im sorry i have not updated in 15 years!!!!!!! online school/quarantine in general has been v stressful but!! i am writing when I can and I have written this so!! i also write like. better when I'm writing about what I know and all I know right now is animal crossing so this felt suitable lmao  
> ok enough rambling from me enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“When the fuck are we going to get a goddamn bridge?” Whizzer groaned, staring intently at the television.

“Should I Google it for you?” Marvin asked, laughing softly.

“Absolutely not. We are going to do this on our own, you hear me?” Whizzer responded passionately. “We have to get a bridge someday, it’s only a matter of time.”

Jason turned to his father, mouthing ‘Please Google it,’ before refocusing his attention on the game.

“I see a bee! I see a goddamn bee!” Whizzer exclaimed, moving his character around excitedly.

“Where?” Jason asked, having his own character move towards him, trying to run into the river.

“It’s over there! See it?” Whizer asked, his own character also running into an invisible barrier at the water. “Let us cross! Let us cross!”

“Come on, bee! Fly over here!” Jason called out.

“Buying this game was a mistake,” said Marvin, watching his lover and his son lose their minds.

“Bullshit. This was the best decision of your life,” replied Whizzer, sparing his lover a glance.

“Okay, I’ve been lenient because Animal Crossing appears to be driving you utterly insane, but stop cursing in front of Jason,” said Marvin, choosing to ignore Whizzer’s comment.

“It’s not driving me insane. It’s opening up a whole new world of possibilities.” He paused for a minute, before continuing, “With these possibilities, comes a fuck ton of cursing.”

Jason laughed as Marvin shook his head, unable to contain a smile.

“Hey, we should visit Char and Delia. Maybe we can steal their bridges,” Jason said, his character running aimlessly around.

“Ooh, let me text them,” Whizzer replied, reaching for his phone.

\- hi jase and i are coming to your island TRY to stop us :) -whizz

\- Ooh, i wouldnt dare… bring a fishing rod, i feel like being entertained -delia

\- fuck you. coming over now -whizz

“We can go,” Whizzer told the room at large.

With that, Whizzer and Jason’s characters ran to the airport, taking a flight to their neighbors’ island.

“Why is their island called Cinnabon?” Jason asked, an eyebrow raised.

“Because they’re demon lesbians who thrive on cinnamon rolls and human tears,” Whizzer responded simply.

“Okay,” said Jason, nodding and turning back to the television.

“Uh-” Marvin began, but Whizzer pressed a finger to his lover’s lips, smirking, his eyes still glued to the screen.

“I’m gonna call said demon lesbians so we don’t have to use the shit typing,” Whizzer said, the contacting screen already on his phone.

“Epic,” replied Jason, watching the long cutscene progress.

“Heyy,” Cordelia’s voice rang through the speaker on Whizzer’s phone. “If y’all could, like, hurry up landing that would be excellent.”

“Any problems with the speed at which we travel the fucking ocean can be addressed at Dodo Airlines,” said Whizzer, monotone.

“Please, Orville doesn’t give a shit about any of us,” Cordelia replied cheerfully.

“Amen. I make the son of a bitch blush, and he sends me to the fucking spiral island or whatever again!! Fucker,” Whizzer ranted.

“Whizzer,” Marvin said weakly, “I love you, but you have to tone down on the cursing. Please.”

“That’s not what you said when we went ice skating,” Whizzer replied, smirking at his boyfriend.

“Oh, fuck you,” replied Marvin.

“Exhibit A,” Whizzer replied, leaning over to kiss Marvin (Jason looked away pointedly).

“Okay, when you and Marvin are done making out, you have arrived at Cinnabon!” said Cordelia lightly. “Any questions about the name will remain unanswered. We thank you for your cooperation.”

“Whizzer says it’s because you’re demon lesbians who thrive on cinnamon rolls and human tears,” Jason supplied helpfully.

“It’s a lifestyle,” Charlotte said from the other end of the line.

“And the other demon has arrived!” grinned Whizzer.

“We’re demons and proud. Stop demon abuse!” called Cordelia, before stopping. “Whizzer, how is it you have a shit outfit?”

“We don’t have the shop yet! But I see yours and I am going to steal everything. Love you, Delia,” replied Whizzer defensively, his character already entering the shop.

After a solid fifteen minutes, Whizzer was satisfied with his outfit, and out the four went to explore Cinnabon.

“It doesn’t look much like a Cinnabon,” Whizzer remarked, running over some flowers around Charlotte and Cordelia’s house.

“Trample our hybrids and I’m revoking our best-friendship, Brown,” said Charlotte seriously.

Whizzer gasped. “You wouldn’t,” he whispered incredulously.

“Oh, yes I would. Also, go fishing,” replied Charlotte.

“Boo,” said Whizzer.

“Look, we’ll make you a deal,” came Cordelia’s voice. “If you can catch one fish, we’ll let you go to our shop and you can buy a vaulting pole.”

Whizzer was silent for a moment. “Fuck you,” he said simply, pulling out a fishing rod. “Can Jason suffer with me?”

“No,” replied Cordelia. “He and Marvin can be amused with us.”

“You really are demon lesbians,” muttered Whizzer.

“Yep!” said Cordelia with a smile. “Proud to be the spawn of Satan!”

Rolling his eyes, Whizzer began his quest of fishing. The second he began putting his rod in the river, Cordelia and Charlotte’s characters immediately burst into tears.

“You guys are the worst,” said Whizzer, glaring at Marvin and Jason, who were stifling laughter.

When a vibration coursed through his remote, Whizzer jumped and quickly pressed the A button. His rod shot back out of the water, no fish attached.

“But it did the thing!” exclaimed Whizzer indignantly as Cordelia laughed so hard that you could hear static through the line.

“I believe it did a thing, but that doesn’t mean it did the thing,” Charlotte supplied helpfully.

“Okay, I didn’t come here to solve a riddle, assholes. We just want your damn vaulting pole,” replied Whizzer.

“To retrieve what you desire, one fish you must acquire,” said Cordelia, holding back fits of laughter.

“Ok, first of all, fuck you, I did nothing to deserve that and it was completely unkind. Second of all, how the fuck did you come up with that so quickly?” asked Whizzer.

“Okay, this is excessive cursing even for you,” said Marvin cooly.

“Look, I told you! This game brings out my alter ego by the name of Vhizzer, and Vhizzer curses like there’s no tomorrow,” replied Whizzer brightly, his eyes following the shadow of a fish in the water.

“To answer your question, Whizz - it’s actually a demon lesbian thing - we can think of rhymes at the drop of a hat,” Cordelia answered unhelpful.

Choosing to ignore this comment, Whizzer simply said, “Okay, if you two don’t move and cry somewhere else, I swear to God-”

Whizzer tossed his fishing rod into the water, letting out a gasp when it came up with a fish. “Hah! I got it! Fuck you!” he exclaimed, grinning.

“Darn you and your black basses,” muttered Charlotte.

“The most metal of all fish,” said Cordelia with a smirk.

“Okay, we’re stealing a vaulting pole, and we are evacuating,” said Whizzer, racing to the shop with Jason.

“Wow, sometimes I think you care more about the vaulting pole than us,” Cordelia replied.

“Sometimes,” said Whizzer, the corner of his mouth twitching.

“How kind,” Cordelia said genially. “Really, we choose our friends based on manners alone. How else would we have ended up with this one?”

“Precisely. Yes, we got the vaulting pole! Peace out, Cinnabon!” Whizzer exclaimed, already leaving the island.

“Before we go, can I give Charlotte and Cordelia some constructive criticism on their island?” Jason asked.

“Go for it,” replied Whizzer, before the lesbians had time to reply.

“There’s not enough cinnamon buns.”

And with that, Jason and Whizzer had left the island.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so:  
> a) canyoutellidontknowhowtouseitalllicsonthiswebsite  
> b) i absolutely identify as a demon lesbian who thrives on cinnamon rolls and human tears and I am very happy with this label this is my True Self  
> c) Vhizzer is actually who dies at the end of falsettos..... whizzer lives don't worry they're identical so there was confusion and when they went to the hospital and asked to see whizzer the receptionist person thing misheard it as vhizzer and it's a long story but whizzer is alive thx  
> d) uh thanks sarah, bri, callie, and jar for reading my fanfics and stuff and telling me they're chill bc!! idk i need that so here's a shoutout
> 
> and finally,,  
> i am gonna try to write things i swear!! i absolutely cannot promise frequent updates but i don't plan on abandoning this fic!! rly it's just gonna be the tkf doing random things,, they probably won't usually be in quarantine or anything but!! i have no timeline for this whatsoever!! things are happening!! it's a vibe!!
> 
> ok I'm sorry i'll stop talking now leave kudos and comments and i will love you forever you can attack me or worship me at @sophiessalad on insta but like dm me for i shall not accept random follow requests but yeah be my friend be my enemy lets vibe together
> 
> ok byeeeeeeeeeee


End file.
